My problem is that I still believe the lie...

The lie that hard work pays off in the end. That if you are good, good things happen to you. That if you go to work everyday and do a good job you will be rewarded. I know this isn't true. I have lived that this isn't true. But yet, somehow, for some strange reason, my soft gooey center hasn't caught on. It hasn't learned that hard work just makes you the chump. And the only reward you get is a banana like you're a chimp.

How come no one told me about <insert name of my bank here> online billpay?

Must find ways to look busy while I have nothing to do.

Call me Cassandra

(I always knew that classical Latin degree would come in handy sometime.) For some reason when I speak, people do not believe what I say. Maybe it's b/c "everybody lies." Everybody but me that is. I said I'm going to South Beach. (Flight and hotel reservations are in hand.) I said I was buying a car. (Got the loan to prove it.) I said I'm going back to school... again. (Found the program and started pricing books.) I provide all of this evidence in order to show that I don't make threats. I see them as I waste of time and oxygen. When I say something, I follow through on it. So people, really, stop being surprised when I tell you something and it happens, or you are going to find yourselves caught in the rain without an umbrella. And you can't say I didn't warn you.

Brown is my new blue.

I don't understand people

Example 1: I write down explicit instructions on how to complete a task. It would go faster if instead of asking me what to do, you just read the sheet of paper that I handed you... Example 2: I am supposed to complete a project. Instead of asking me if I have done so, you start on the project yourself. I allow you to, knowing that I have actually already done it. But you didn't ask.

Aimless wanderings...

For the last damn time, it's not "like osmosis" Never piss off people smarter than you I don't get paid to watch you work I'm not the only one saying "seriously" all the time How is it only Tuesday?

Dear Lord in Heaven

Someone remind me to never watch Grey's Anatomy without a spare inhaler again...

I wonder if I can teach myself linear algebra

I think that I have seen all the episodes of Perry Mason.

I think my diet could use some fiber

South Park was right. Earth is an intergalactic reality tv show. That is the only thing that explain how people behave: Stabbing you in the back as the look you in the face. Shaking your hand with the one they just wiped themselves with. And my personal favorite, taking credit for your triumphs while blaming you for their mistakes.

Is a new job worth $8000?

You betcha.

Today was the first day that I didn't get physically ill upon waking up to go to work in 2 months

And now for today's thoughts: Paula Cole really isn't good driving music I think I should work in the health care industry for a while People really should listen to me It's not my job to make sure that people higher above me have been trained properly, therefore I will not question what they tell me I will just do as I am told

I need new contacts

As I sat in the traffic nightmare caused by someone trying to take out a light pole in front of the courthouse, I glanced up at a sign in front of the SPCA What I saw: Spay or Neuter You & Pet What it said: Spay or Neuter Your Pet In my defense, there was a bit of space before the "r"

Bah Humbug

Stress does not make me happy

it does not make me work harder it just makes me sick to my stomach literally so when i say i refuse to be stressed, people should listen to me b/c really, this is not worth it and i'm not a glutton for punishment

The New 5 Year Plan...

pay off car in 2 years go to Hawaii go to school for statistical analysis start working in public sector

Seriously

How the hell can the side effect of a medication be flu or tuberculosis?  Do they put tb in the pill?

Apparently no one listens to me

I guess everyone just thought I was blowing smoke out my ass when I said that I wouldn't keep promises they made on my behalf. If I didn't make the commitment myself, I see no reason why I should be held responsible when it doesn't happen. Oopsie, guess someone should ask me first.

I really should not have children

Umm..... You got 15 mommyness points!

YOUR CHILDREN ARE DOOMED!

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 0% on mommyness

Link: The would you be a good mommy Test written by mysticalj22 on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

I would probably be happier if I worked for a university.

"It's not that bad..."

How the hell do you know how bad it is? Why do people waste good oxygen talking about things they know nothing about? Until you become me, you have no idea what my life is like. Maybe my favorite dog died... Maybe my favorite grandmother died... Why does anyone who is not me feel that they are justified in evaluating my current mood. Seriously people, you need to worry about your own lives and butt out of mine.

SCORE!

I love it when a tv charatcer states she won't be having children. Especially when it is a smart character. Bones will get canceled now. Oh well, it was great while it lasted.